Sudden Outbreak Of Smiling On The South Coast



January 15, 2005 -- Much excitement in the City today. Grown men walked about with smiles on their faces and a spring in their step. What happened to cause such an outbreak of smileyness (if smileyness isn't a real word then I lay claim to it) and general spring in steppedness Did the Queen declare Portsmouth as an area of natural outstanding beauty and demand it's citizens be exempt from paying Taxes Nope.

Has the City Council replaced it's counter staff with people that actually smile Nope. Has the Spinnaker Tower actually been built and is now standing proudly and in full at the Gunwharf Quays Ok, the first two were long shots but the Tower finally getting built is in the realms of fantasy.

"It's a late Christmas Present" said the man with a tie that is so sickening it could replace the Heimlich Manourve. "God must be a Pompey fan" said another who looked as if the last time he spoke to a vicar, he was being reprimanded for stealing the lead from the Church roof.

So what happened Portsmouth have drawn their deadly rivals Southampton in the FA Cup 4th Round. To make the deal even sweeter, Southampton are managed by ex Portsmouth boss Harry "I need a rest from football, oops,
I've taken the Southampton job 2 weeks later" Redknapp. Mr Redknapp is as popular as a bacon sandwich at a Jewish wedding in these parts after leaving The Blues for the The Saints 30 miles away so he can expect a warm reception from the traveling Pompey fans when they play.

The man was on the radio this evening pleading with the Portmouth fans not to give him a hard time and to remember all the good times that they shared and to recall where the team was before he went there and took them upto the Premier League. From my experiences of Robert Pires's treatment, I expect Portsmouth fans to think it about it for a second before launching into 90 mins of singing songs about Harry and Jim's habit that makes toilet tissue a useful item.




Sudden Outbreak Of Smiling On The South Coast



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