The start of a new year is supposed to be a time of New Year's resolutions, rejuvenation and a fresh start. For many couples, sadly enough it doesn't turn out that way.
According to the research of Relationship Coaches Susie and Otto Collins (authors of "Should You Stay or Should You Go"), more decisions to divorce and leave a relationship are made after
January 1 than any other time of the year. These reasons include:
1. "I'll Just Get Through the Holidays" Mentality. People who are contemplating divorce don't usually want to spoil the holidays for their children and their families so they keep their
feelings to themselves. Most couples avoid looking at and doing something about the problems that exist in their relationships before and during the holiday season to keep up appearances.
2. Old Fears Surface and Problems are Magnified. Holidays tend to bring up old feelings, fears, and resentments that have been buried and this all comes to a head when life returns to
"normal" in January.
3. Feeling of Resignation, Confusion and "I Don't Like Any of My Choices." When there are long-standing, unresolved issues in a relationship, there are usually feelings of hopelessness
and confusion. There can be the feeling of being pulled in different directions and not knowing what to do about their situation. These feelings are especially difficult to deal with when
others are experiencing the hope of a new year.
Can anything be done to clarify their choices to make the best decision possible and perhaps prevent divorce or the relationship from dissolving
Yes--and there are some common mistakes people make when considering this decision.
One of these mistakes is not being honest with themselves about what's truly happening in their relationship. They are usually making a lot of assumptions about what happened in the past
and what may happen in the future, which may or may not be the reality of their situation. They do not have a clear picture of what's happening in their lives and they don't know how to
get one.
Is that all Not by any means, but these are just a few of the concerns that Susie and Otto Collins help people sort out in their free course "The 5 Biggest Mistakes People Make When
Considering Whether to Stay in or Leave a Relationship," available from their website at http://www.StayorGo.com/5mistakes . Review copies
of their book "Should You Stay or Should You Go" and interviews are available on request.
Call Susie and Otto Collins at 614-459-8121